October 15, 2015
I don’t write because I am inspired to write. I do it because I am inspired to make a difference and this is the talent I feel attached to the most, the talent which is the most polished.
December 06, 2017
I felt guilty reading the above seconds ago. I have’t written in so long. Not because I haven’t been inspired to write but because I feel trapped in a way. I’m playing this game where I can’t be myself and I’m just pushing to get through to make it to the end and I know that I can make it to the end, and so I’m pushing. I’m pushing without heart, and I’m just using every skill I’ve acquired, no talent, or the talent that is most reachable. I’m faking it….I’m so tired of holding my breath, but when I try to breath others get hurt, and so I need a space? A space of my own to breathe and scream, and write, and throw all of my emotions out without that gentle hand at my chest keeping my safe, with my back to the wall.
The first time I wrote it created in me a feeling of absoluteness, and there was no fear, no traps, no restrictions, and I was me. That’s all I’ve ever needed.
Writing inspired me to write.