The average man or woman who expects everyone else to be equally as average comes to the conclusion that I am after a few seconds. The open-minded man or woman takes a while longer. But they arrive at the same conclusion. Some like the oddity which my existence present, others dislike it, and it makes no difference to others. But to me, it means all the world.
Twitter. Tumblr. Pinterest. Instagram. Facebook.
The list is long and continues to grow at a pace which is simply too fast for me to keep up. But that’s not the big problem. That prize goes to my inability to adequately communicate using them…I am not a people person. I don’t communicate with people for the purpose of being popular or to be liked. That is the purpose of all these applications.
After being introduced to Facebook, I thought we’d be friends, lovers even. But it turns out that we can’t. In my fanciful world where reality and daydreams collide I forgot about my inability to be…the opposite of me. Some people leave extensively detailed posts, and in return receive an influx of back-and-forth comments between friends and acquaintance of theirs. Some persons leave a few words, and the same result pops out. I have no such luck.
I am a show-stopper.
Before commenting on a Facebook status I watch as the conversation sprouts into the various categories that are possible and then I delve in, have my say, and wait for an opposing opinion to counter my own. But lo, there is none. A conversation which has been ongoing nonstop for twenty minutes, an hour, some more, some less halts for good without a conclusion. I cannot count the number of heated discussions that have ended immediately after my entrance. Now, you could argue that I’m being paranoid. Though I may be, how would you view it if this happened to you over and over without fail?
I am persistent.
To come to this “show-stopper” conclusion I have commented in many discussions. After all I live for interactions in which the speaker’s mindset is challenged and changed. I found that many of the discussions simply died. But thankfully, I was able to find a circle that does not halt at my entrance but continues on its path lifting me from my feet and on its journey.
Finding a circle is all well and good but I don’t think the popular writers dwell in one cirlce. At least not the well known, widely read ones. Do they? What am I missing? Of course there are many other social networking sites(SNS) but I they don’t appeal to me as a writer, and I would still be faced with the dilemma of not knowing how illicit desired reactions with fellow users of those sites.
But blogging suits me. (Right?) It’s where I’m the most honest about everything. It’s where I am the most open, and because the turnover in terms of viewers isn’t that quick for the majority I don’t feel badly (though I should). It’s where I feel as though I’m doing exactly what I want to do as a writer: forming an emotional connection with you, and building a relationship that will last.
Improvement is needed. My dry sense of humour doesn’t come across, and my writing isn’t superb. But here, where I can write one thousand words and trust that you’ll love me for it, is where I rest my cap.
Do you have the same problem? If you don’t, please tell me your secret.